Update and OT

So I figured something out about that babygap gift card. I can use it @ Old N*vy! Hurrah! Even better? ON has 0-3 month newborn hats!!! How fantastic!!! You would not believe how hard it is to find sunhats for newborns. I have two that are 0-6 months, but do you have any idea the difference in head sizes between newborns and 6 month olds? It's staggering. So I ordered the gnome a bunch of fun things- shorts, a cute toucan onesie, a little bubble dress, the hat, and I think a cardigan for when she gets bigger. Now i just need a little summer-weight cardigan for her to wear NOW (they were sold out in her current size). I can't wait for it to get here!

Also, today i figured out the whole reason for the proper latch. When I took the nursing class, nobody told me that it doesn't matter HOW you get the proper latch - the point is that the baby is not pulling on your nipple. I thought it was all about HOW she attached and it didn't matter beyond that. Well, that was until the searing pain returned today. Then I realized "oh, now I get it". So now I just have to make sure we don't have any issues in mouth placement.. So THAT'S why they discourage pacifiers and bottles... Damn. You know, all of this could have been avoided had they just told me about this BEFORE. Anyway. Now I have to figure out how to heal whilst still feeding her. Not an easy task, and now I'm getting engorged, so I had to pump, which didn't yield much because it was too painful to even pump, so i stopped at one ounce. Oy, I have made yet another mess. Patience, I guess.

Also, the OT:

So last night on the phone with my brother in law's boyfriend he was telling me about some issues he's having with the BIL and he was talking about the virtues of therapy, and he says to me:

"Remember when you guys were fighting and there almost wasn't going to be a wedding? Well I said to D*** (the FIL) "I don't know if they're even going to last long enough to have a wedding if they don't get help, let alone get a divorce". And then you got help and everything was fine- so we (he and the BIL) should be fine if we get therapy, too"

UMMM....

First of all, we were NEVER at a point where we almost didn't get married. NEVER. Where he got that from is beyond me, and that someone actually believed that irritates the hell out of me. That's one. Two, that he was talking to my (then future) FIL about the state of my relationship behind my back INFURIATES me. Okay. Here's some background. In August of 2006 my then-fiance (now husband) and I were bickering more than usual because i was bored and lonely with no real purpose or anyone to talk to. Anyways, we had a big fight and he told his dad about it (he has since stopped that) and his dad planted the seed of my neuroses and made the bs comment about how we'd end up divorced and he and my MIL would end up raising our kids (even if we did get divorced there's no way in F*** I'd ever let them raise my child). Anyways, a few months ago I told the bf of the BIL about this comment, and he didn't say anything that remotely let on that he knew about it already. Here I thought MY business was just that: MY business. Now I'm just pissed at the whole f'ing family. I cannot tell ANYONE ANYTHING ANYMORE. That's it. I'm done with the lot of them. I can't believe they were discussing me and my relationship with my husband behind our backs. I'm just over it.

Father's day is Sunday, and my husband has declined to get anything for his dad. I know we're going to get major crap for this from the in laws- they're going to go ballistic, but my husband insists he doesn't care. I think he will after Sunday, and i cautioned him about it, but he got all cranky with me, and i can only deal with one cranky person at a time, and i choose the newborn, since she can't help it. So i let it slide with my husband, and now I sort of don't regret it, because once again I'm pissed off at my FIL. I asked my husband why he wasn't buying his dad anything and he said "Every year I spend a ton of money on him and this year what does he get me? A mug". (The FIL bought him a photo mug for his first father's day- last year he bought the FIL those really expensive mailorder steaks). He's also jealous b/c his little brother has gotten a new laptop and top of the line desktop two years in a row for no reason, and they only get my husband birthday gifts. Last birthday he got three books. I'm not getting involved, but that's the reasoning. I have my own nutty family to worry about. Like my dad, who I will have to write about some other time because it would take too long to tell everything and I'm tired. Lets just say he has a minor ego problem and is having issues with the ladies...