The woman of your dreams.

This is how bad things have gotten: Yesterday, my husband told me he had a sex dream about ME.

Naturally, I felt terrible. Flattered, but terrible. Once my mom is no longer here to take the baby out of my arms for a few precious minutes each day, I don't know what the heck I'm going to do. It's never good when your husband is feeling 'deprived.' I mean, isn't that when they start looking elsewhere? I've been cheated on by two different ex-boyfriends for not putting out, so I of all people should know. (In my own defense, I had good excuses. The first time I was FOURTEEEN, and the other, well, there was no physical attraction and he would have been my first and I didn't feel like letting my first be with someone who I was mildly repulsed by. Also, turns out it was a good thing I resisted, because when he cheated it was with a whore, and heaven knows what she gave him. I mean, besides a "good time").

The baby seems to be getting bigger. Her head seems huge. And she seems heavier. I guess that's normal. I jokingly said I'd be ripped by the time she started walking, but my MIL corrected me. She also told me the baby's eyes will change to brown in the next week or so. I didn't have the energy to argue with her about it, but I'm sure I read it usually takes about a year for the eyecolor to change. And I had to ignore the "brown" comment. Why brown? Why can't her eyes be green, hazel or blue? More importantly, why do people always have to insist I'm wrong and they know everything?

Last, I am going to put out a heads up to the world. Do not listen when people insist that buying 0-3 month clothing is a waste of money and the baby will only get one use of everything. I go through about three outfits a day with her, and I stupidly listened to the jackasses that told me to buy larger sizes and have hardly any 0-3 month outfits to begin with. The 3-6 and beyond are all still too big. How the hell am I supposed to dress my baby for the next three months with a dresser full of too-big clothes? So here's my advice: buy the 0-3 outfits, the 3-6 and the 6-9. Three months is a long time for a baby to go buck naked. The best part is, everyone keeps buying me summer clothes in 6-9 month sizes as gifts. In 6-9 months it will be NOVEMBER- I'm sorry, but what use is a sundress in NOVEMBER? Hawaii this is not. Do people even think anymore?